Monday, October 06, 2008
one mth since i last blog......as usual much happen during the past month..though i don really know where to start...i guess i'm still the same old me....perhaps all i need is some1 who could really understand me and open me up.....cause rite now..i'm really feeling very very down....and it feels like i'm stuck in a world of i cant either move forwad cause whenever i do dat something is stopping me and if i tried to turn backwards its a dead wall...so i'm stuck..confine..i'm really feeling terrible...
gonna go reservists end of the mth...for 2 weeks..perhaps its not a good timing...anyway met up with a army friend of my...realised than most of them are studying...accept me working...i wondering if i made the right choice to start working and not continue to study...i hope this decision of mine...wont haunt me in future..cause of some reasons..if not i would have gone overseas to study...well...its just not meant to be...i guess somewhere in my life...i made a very big decision that could perhaps change my fate...and i regretted already...somethings shouldnt even start in the first place..haiz..
i'm not tryin to make myself sound very ke lian or wad...its just...perhaps if i hadnt made that decision out of rushness...perhaps i wont feel the way i am now le..and things wouldnt be as bad as it is now...cause its really dat bad...my life...my future...looks bleak...and i don really see it change as time passes...gonez~
p.s. If we were not together...perhaps we wont feel so troubled...we would be so much better without each other...happier??...stressless??...fortunate??...troublefree??...and lastly...able to smile each day with any worries...i'm regretting~
{ i was alone at 10:39 am}
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