Friday, August 29, 2008

Once i thought if i perservere in something...eventually something good will come by...but it seems nth or perhaps worst than i thought...anyway just this song i find it very meaningful and it sums up how i feel...very true~~


萧敬腾 - 奋不顾身

大雨 像下了一世纪
我用 手臂撑起屋顶
曾经 你就在我怀里 让我 风平雨停 我好想你
我 是沉默的行星
移动 都以你为中心
只是 未世一来临 一切化为灰烬都回不去


我用我的生命爱你
不让尖锐的世界伤害你
不懂花言巧语的人″我爱你″ 往往来不及证明
我用我的生命爱你
忘记自己也毫不留情
爱一个人 奋不顾身
喔 辛苦 也觉得平静


时间 是唯一的线索
印证 我没说的承诺
当我 放开你的手 如果有点振动
不是发抖


我用我的生命爱你
不让尖锐的世界伤害你
不懂花言巧语的人″我爱你″ 往往来不及证明
我用我的生命爱你
忘记自己也毫不留情
爱一个人 奋不顾身
喔 辛苦 也觉得平静


穿过巨大的伤口
我找到当时的温柔
有始有终 就算收获
我从不在乎心痛


我用我的生命爱你
不让尖锐的世界伤害你
不懂花言巧语的人″我爱你″ 往往来不及证明
我用我的生命爱你
忘记自己也毫不留情
爱一个人 奋不顾身喔
辛苦 也觉得平静
我 甘心 因为 我愿意

dats the song....hmm just the last phrase.... wo gan xin....ying wei wo yuan yi.....

{ i was alone at 11:36 am}


its been 3 mths since i'm working le...quite fast though...i guess during this time i'm here...i learn quite alot of stuff...though i'm still not ready to handle projects alone..but still i'm slowly getting the hold of it...which i think few more mths i'll be able to handle le...

its another friday...my fav day of the week once again....but it seems every friday has been wasted just like dat..except for 1 in this mth..well..shall not bring it up again...but all i can say was that..dats the only friday i was really looking forward to it...~

things are starting to look better le....esp my laptop is in quite a good working condition...after last week of conflict..at least i guess its all worth it...

i wonder if any of ur once had this feeling that u wanted to msg this person so badly but whenever u wanted to..u will think of the stuff he/she say to u b4..and it just make ur xin suan suan de...but no matter wad u still wanna just say hi to her despite all this...i wonder wad does this mean...just a simple hi perhaps could heal all this..but i know its impossible...

take things slowly..wad is urs is meant to be urs...if we always leave it to fate and things to happen without doing anything...and hope dat miracle will happen...it will never happen..but if we at least make an effort to change things or...erm just do a little things...than i guess things will have a slight change.....

dats y i left a msg for u..............whether or not u reply...its another thing~

{ i was alone at 9:16 am}

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Monday, August 25, 2008

hmm..had a rough time last week...esp with my laptop..some unhappy incidents with the challenger staffs and manager...so wasnt really nice ba..well alrite it was like this...hmm decided to buy a laptop on tuesday..and i saw it and i buy it...(honestly i somehow was too rush in buying le..) was very excited..cause its been very long since i last had a new laptop..was very eager to go back to use..but as i had to rush to play soccer on dat day...i only get to fully fiddle with my laptop quite late...and as i was typing some stuff i realise..the left side of the keyboard had something wrong..and i was like..huh...zz y like dat de...so i sms my friend cause he is working in challenger de...and he told me to bring it down...

so wed i brought it down...they told me they will send for servicing but somehow i actually don really like the idea of servicing cause its a new machine and have to send for servicing..which i don really trust cause i'm afraid later will have more defect...so i somehow argue with the manager...saying i wont wan to wait..cause i paid money u see...so i told him i would wanna get a new laptop..which he eventually agreed to ... so i saw a hp laptop..the 1 i eventually bought is asus...the reason is because the asus laptop i bought has no more stock in singapore..the 1 and only left..and me unlucky person to buy it ba...sigh..they didnt inform me that if anything happens to my laptop....they wont have any more new stock to replace......dats y i was so pissed off...

though eventually i change to the hp one..but i feel i was like cheated...but at least this is so much better than asus...so some advice for all out dere who wanna buy laptop in future...1stly..don ever buy a model dat has no more stock in the whole country..2ndly...don be blindly by the free gifts they are going to give u...which i was blinded by...3rdly...don go to challenger...trust..they are not true in doing their business...and i can justify dat..personally being thru...though they allow me to change to a new laptop..but...they are just not being honest...so ya..do reconsider if u gonna buy their stuff... cause as far i'm concern i'll never step in dat place to buy any more stuff...and i mean everything they sell..condemned...

Day 8....guess ur forgotten abt me le...i know i shouldnt keep saying or care abt this thing cause u don even treat me as a friend anymore le...deres this saying..noeing some1 is easy..but forgetting some1 is always difficult...at least dats how i feel...take care...

{ i was alone at 1:01 pm}

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Tuesday, August 19, 2008

if i'm not wrong it was ard 4 weeks ago they we know each other...now...we're like strangers le..dats how things changes...it will be the one last time i'm blogging abt this stuff le..i guess its no point me brooding over this matter over and over again.....but i've realised a few things from u ba....and i got to admit i'm too thick skin le...dats y eventually i ended up being emo.....well just one word to describe me....naive....every day staying up till quite late just to hope to chat with u...somehow hoping dat perhaps by chatting we could at least know each other better and see where things will bring us to ba...but it doesnt seem to me dat way as u told me...at least things were better at the start..but i guess after some incidents...ur impression of me starts to change and dats where things end up this way...

i do regret making my feelings known to u ba...if i knew just by saying how i feel...things will become like this....than i would have kept it to myself.....i messed things up...arggzz....nvm nvm nvm i must keep telling myself dat " every good things must come to an end" though the ending wasnt really a good one...at least i know in my life i knew u b4...perhaps we wont even talk or wad le...if time could really change things nvm...i don expect a miracle to happen anyway...but if i could turn back time...than perhaps i would have turn back to the day i just know u...

for me i'm just some1 who trys to walk towards u but to her...she some1 whos always turning her back on me and just walk at ur own pace...haha actually dats life....and its the fact...perhaps if i was some1 she fancy..than things wont be this way...cause i try to put myself her shoes and the only reason i could think of was dat ba...if i wasnt really interested in some1...i guess dats how i would react...and i wont even msg her in msn even if i see her online...but if its the other way rd than i guess ur would know wad i meant ba...yup...even as friends..i guess frens still do chat rite...deres this phrase that stuck my mine all of sudden...."everything always start from friends" 2 person b4 they get together will always start from friends de ba i suppose..but if some1 don even see u as a friend..or is selectively sometimes see u as a friend but sometimes doesnt..than its time u get lost from his/her life... so dats abt wad i have to say ba...all i left to say is...for the 1st time i encounter such incident...so ya~ gonez....take care.. its nice knowing u ba~

{ i was alone at 10:15 am}

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Friday, August 15, 2008

a week ago...i was like so looking forward to friday...a week later..which is today...things seems to have taken a dramatic change....now the feeling i get from u is like i'm a stranger..all of sudden..deres a saying all good things will eventually come to an end...no better time to use this phrase on me i guess...

i thought things will change for the better but i guess i'm foolish and naive to think dat time will somehow make us closer but dats not the case....maybe i shouldnt be giving myself hope that somehow she will notice me someday..haha nv will it come true to be honest...as for the present i gave u and chocos....arh nvm..the more i go on i will on get more suan...dere are somethings which are beyond my control...but i know if its not than i cant force it either......i know perhaps u either don have any feelings or u don noe how to react cause no matter wad we'are just only plain friends......i guess even as friends...sometimes u cant always wait for the other party to take the initative...i'm nth to u i know...we don really chat much in msn..i know its not ur style to msg me....sms...hmm nth much either u forgot to reply..nvm...i understand ur busy...so ya~


The other day i was quite happy to see u..but perhaps u don feel the same way.....foolish foolish howe..having this 1 sided thinking...well....dats me...

some ppl if no matter wad u do..wad u say...how good u treat her she will never be moved even a slightest bit...well i guess dats the way i got to accept ba...

{ i was alone at 9:17 am}

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Thursday, August 14, 2008

Someone once told me that..love cant be force...this phrase somehow keeps coming to my mind whenever i think of something...and it just makes my heart feel a little twisted...well..i guess perhaps i'm persistant? i know dat no matter wad i do...i still wont get any reaction from some1...but its okie..i just follow wad my heart tells me to....its quite xin ku..but at least i feel happy after doing it...

am i foolish? dats wad i thought...like i know clearly she don really erm how should i say just like ok some1 give a gift to me but i'm like just normal...and like the impression is like ...oh thanx those type..haha i also don noe wad i talking..perhaps u ppl reading my blog have gone thru the experience...will roughly know wad i trying to say..its just like......asking " hey how are you today????" and the other person just reply..."fine" haha whereby one person is so enthu whereas the other is forever no expression de..haha yup expression is the word..suddenly thought of it...

its lunch time le...not really hungry and got the mood to write..so here i am...honestly..i also don really know wad to expect...ya~ and nowadays the stuff we chat abt is getting lesser lesser and lesser le..perhaps one day will just die out...and u will thought i ignore u...but actually its not true ba...cant be 1 person always making the first move when the other party doesnt seem to move...hmm so dats abt wad i have to say ba..whether u get to read this..i'll leave it to fate~...gonez

{ i was alone at 11:59 am}

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Tuesday, August 05, 2008

Well last nite some things happen...i feel bad...cause i really didnt wan things to turn out this way..but at least i know....i shldnt be wad i am ba...but now i really kan kai le..so ya..i'm alrite le...

cause i understand how this really goes u see...just a simple phrase to explain it all...it takes 2 to clap...cant be 1 party...doing something and the other simply not doing anything...or not even the slightest of reactions from wad the other party has done for him/her..i guess now i know how it feels le...sigh....its quite sad actually but its the fact..and i don really wan cause of this...eventually i lose a friend..its not worth it ba..i cant possibly force her to like me anyway...its not meant to be this way...

so i already resign to fate that..no matter wad i do..or how good i may treat her...the result is still the same de...i guess being just friends isnt dat bad after all...so ya...dats abt it le...~

{ i was alone at 9:55 am}

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Monday, August 04, 2008

If u wonder y my blog only got 2 miserable post..than just know..i've delete all my previous..for some reasons...but...i will blog a often as i can...

lately...i wonder if i'm thinking a lot or wad...not the usual me actually...but at least i know wad i really want....

sometimes its hard for me to know wad ur thinking...though i hope i could at least read ur mind..but it seems so hard...perhaps its because we just know not long ago...so i guess u don really know how to reach everything ur facing...ya..i just hope time changes everything...for as long as u know...me be the guy who enter ur life for the first time...dats all i can say for now...

{ i was alone at 11:22 am}

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Friday, August 01, 2008

hmm...few days ago went to play soccer..and i realise both my knee cap are like giving up on me le..its like whenever i play finish or halfway thru..i will start to feel pain on both sides...hmm is this a sign??quite scare actually...cause now i cant even squat will pain..just scare i might have to go for operation...maybe i will stop playing first..though i really cant bear to but i see how ba...will monitor the situation....

Few days ago..met my bestie..was very surprised and shocked that..he purposed to his gf when they were at tokyo mount fuji...i was like Wah...and though i don say it out..but deep down..i felt a little pinch...well simply is becos..perhaps i nv had a chance to go overseas with my love 1....i doubt that will happen in near future...but dats not the main point...regarding the purposed..the reason y i was so surprised cause they only got together for less than a yr and yet now my friend actually proposed to her le...was like asking him so many questions like..does both of ur parents know??hmm did they say anything or wad...and he told me that both parties parents knew abt this and they have no objections or wad so ever...well..off course i feel happy for my bestie..cause i know he went thru alot in his love life...esp during his poly days..and now he has found some1 and going to settle down with her...

From this..i can really see some things...dat is..a couple not necessary have to be together for a very long time to eventually get married or wad...wad is most important is actually whether both parties can get along well or not...i just realise that if 2 person cant really get well together...no matter how long ur together be it 3 yrs or 10 yrs....eventually they wont end up together...

i guess i reach a stage in my life whereby i really have to think for my future...though...my ideal age of settling down is actually 28....but if can earlier i actually wont mind..but perhaps a few yrs earlier will be alrite too..=) but so far from how i'm doing in monetary wise and love wise..i doubt dat will happen....but anyway i wish my frend all the best....

{ i was alone at 11:24 am}

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